More states allowing kids to take mental health days

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< 10pt; line-height: 12pt;text-align: left; ">Carolyn Cole Los Angeles Times/TNS

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U.S. Surgeon General Vivek H. Murthy tours King/Drew Magnet High School of Medicine and Science in Los Angeles on Dec. 6, 2021, before talking to a panel of students about mental health issues.

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In 2020, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, suicide was the second leading cause of death among teens, a 31% rise over 2019.

Christine M. Nicholson, a clinical child psychologist in Kirkland, Wash., said she supports this effort to allow mental health days. She said kids sometimes need to skip school, go for a hike, see a movie or even stay home and bake a cake or watch TV.

“I think mental health has to be appreciated as much as physical health,” she said. “Kids are having a tough time, and they need a break.”

“The pandemic, with its isolation, didn’t help,” said California state Sen. Anthony Portantino, a Democrat who introduced a bill that was signed into law in 2021. The bill does not specify how many days a year a child can take. Portantino’s brother Michael took his own life in 2010 at age 52.

Proponents of such measures say they are long overdue and can help de-stigmatize mental health in the eyes of parents and children. So far, Washington, California, Illinois, Maine, Virginia, Colorado, Oregon, Connecticut, Arizona, Nevada, Utah and Kentucky provide mental health days.

“If nothing else, it makes a huge statement that mental health matters as much as physical health,” said Mike Winder, a Republican Utah state representative who sponsored a bill that became law in 2021. Winder introduced the bill after conversations with his daughter, who suffered with her own mental health issues.

“This policy is communicating from the highest levels that it’s OK to take care of your mental health,” he said of the bill, which does not limit the number of days a child can take.

But how does taking a “mental health day,” which Americans traditionally have construed as an excuse for playing hooky, improve mental health?

“When students are feeling physically unwell, there is a universal understanding that they should stay home and they should take time to feel better,” said Barb Solish, director of Youth and Young Adult Initiatives for the National Alliance on Mental Illness, which supports the use of mental health days.

“School policies that recognize mental health as an acceptable reason for absence can help students take the time they need to care for themselves and restore their health,” Solish said. “Practically speaking, if you have a fever, you’re not paying attention in class, right? You’re not learning the lesson. If you’re feeling overwhelming anxiety, you’re not learning either.”

In states that have adopted them, the policies vary, although in all cases, parents must sign a note excusing their child. Some place limits on the number of days off a child can claim – for instance, in Connecticut, students can have two days per year and they may not be consecutive – while others, such as California, do not.

As with all absences, missed schoolwork is expected to be made up. But the policies do not dictate how the days off may be used – whether for staying in bed or attending therapy appointments or something else. Some suggest that could engender abuse. Portantino bristles at the idea.

“We don’t question that a parent would like Johnny to stay home because he has a cold. That’s the exact reason we have to have this bill. That’s a stigma we have to correct. We’re not making a distinction between physical and mental health. If your child is sick, your child is sick,” he said.

But some worry that isn’t the right approach.

In the National Review, Daniel Buck, editor in chief of Chalkboard Review, a newsletter focusing on education, wrote that school mental health days “could alleviate immediate distress but facilitate habits that only worsen anxiety and depression in the long run.” He suggested that they would teach kids avoidance rather than how to deal with the real issues that plague them, such as too much social media.

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Instead, he suggests schools help build “habits of emotional awareness such as regular reflection, discussions with loved ones, or planned, appropriately timed days of rest.”

Solish said it’s important for parents to get to the bottom of why a child might ask for time off. And, she added, if a child is asking for or taking an abundance of these days off, that can be a signal something is wrong and indicates a need for professional help.

“We’re not going to solve the youth mental health crisis with a few mental health days. But it’s a great starting point.”

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MAKE THE MOST OF A ‘MENTAL HEALTH’ DAY

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“There’s no perfect way to take a mental health day,” said Barb Solish, director of Youth and Young Adult Initiatives for the National Alliance on Mental Illness. “But it does help to be intentional.”

Here are her tips for reaping the most benefit from a mental health day.

< 10pt; line-height: 12pt;text-align: left; ">Listen to your child: Ask open-ended questions about their relationships and experiences and why they think they need a day off. Then let them talk.

< 10pt; line-height: 12pt;text-align: left; ">Make it meaningful: Try to avoid catching up on school work or getting lost in social media. “Those are stressors for kids,” Solish said.

< 10pt; line-height: 12pt;text-align: left; ">Pursue calming activities: Take a walk, bake, draw, get lost in nature. “Whatever brings your kid back to center is a good thing to do,” said Solish, adding that you don’t want to overschedule the day, because that will be stressful in its own way. Should parents allow kids to indulge in video games, television or other screen time? “Nothing is really off limits,” Solish said. “You just want to make sure you’re being really thoughtful about what is going to help.”

< 10pt; line-height: 12pt;text-align: left; ">Ease up on the feelings talk: “You don’t have to push kids to talk about their feelings all day,” Solish said. You can talk about how important it is to take care of your mental health.

< 10pt; line-height: 12pt;text-align: left; ">Know when you need more help: If your child is showing increased irritability, sleeplessness, a depressed mood, low motivation or is regularly asking to stay home from school, you may need help from a mental health professional. Contact a pediatrician, school counselor or your family doctor to find a recommendation.